Friday, March 14, 2008

Lostness

Didja ever feel that your insides have come disassociated with the rest of you? And that they have entered a tilt-a-whirl world of their own? Spinning and looping into some dark place...I pray...and I know my prayers are heard...I just don't feel that connection.

I'll not get into the why's and wherefore's...there are too many now...just...

The past comes to the present...

The future forms a Damoclean Sword...

And the present seems lost...

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Uncertainties

Why is it, that so much of what is certain in life, is not?

Why does knowing that your uncertainty is an official uncertainty makes it so much more tolerable?

Why do we ask why, when we know that there is no answer?

Heh...

And on we go, certain in our uncertainty...

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

For our country

I pray....

Lord, please bless our people as we choose our leaders, not with what we deserve, but with those that will guide us and our country in the direction that you would have us go. Please guide our hands and hearts to choose leaders that will uphold Your values and will help us protect those most deserving.

Amen

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

That Day

Every generation has That Day…that one day that the world seems to stop, to freeze, and our collective memory can tell us, exactly what we did, where we were, what we were doing and thinking. For most of our grandparents', That Day was December 7, 1941; for our parents', That Day was November 22, 1963; and for our generation, That Day will forever be September 11, 2001.

I left home to run over to my in‑laws' house, as I was in the kitchen getting some leftovers, my father‑in‑law came out of the back room to ask me if I had heard about the plane flying into the WTC. I made light of it, asking if some joy‑rider in a Cessna had gotten lost, or fallen asleep, and he told me no, it was an airliner. I could not believe it, and went back. As I was there, I called my wife, and told her what was happening. As I was talking to her, I saw, behind the talking heads on the TV, a plane fly into one of the towers. At first, I thought it was a replay…and then I noticed that this plane had flown into the rear tower, but it was the front tower that was already smoking. And I knew that this was a second crash. It took about 2 or 3 minutes for the talking heads on TV to acknowledge this second plane. I watched for a few more minutes, until around 8:30, and then left for work.


For some reason, I did not listen to the news as I drove the 30 minutes to work, and so when I got to work I was utterly unprepared when my boss asked if I had been called up (I had re‑enlisted in the National Guard the month before) due to the attack on the Pentagon. I rushed into the conference room and watched the images of the Pentagon burning, heard the confused reports of truck bombs at State, fires on the Mall and other incidents. I called my guard unit, and was told that we were on notice, but no call‑up. I drove the 30 miles back home to get my gear and uniforms so that I would be ready the instant I was called up.

Very little work was done on that somber Tuesday in September; we spent most of our time watching broadband news broadcasts or the TV in the conference room. There we watched the people choosing a 1/4 mile plummet to facing avgas‑fueled fires; there we watched the unparalled bravery of NYC's firefighters and police officers; watched the unbowed courage, defiance, and above all generosity, of those citizens of a city normally regarded for their rudeness and apathy; heard of the crash of Flight 93, and the reports of the cell phone calls from passengers on the planes.

It was later that we learned of the countless acts of personal heroism, generosity faith and kindness of countless New Yorker's, workers in the Pentagon, the everyday business commuters on United Flight 93. Those examples showed to all the world that America is not a race, or nationality or culture, but it is an ideal. It is an ideal of courage, self‑reliance and self‑sacrifice that transcends national origin, creed, color and race.

That Day tested the mettle of a nation, a President, and a way‑of‑life. Individuals, also, where tested that day. Some, like Todd Beamer and his fellow passengers on Flight 93 met that challenge with a prayer, and a smile, and hearty "Let's Roll" and conquered those that would seek to destroy us. Others rediscovered bonds with families, friends and culture. That test continues, and while some might doubt whether we will pass, I have no doubt that he, this nation, and this way‑of‑life will prevail.


Its been some years since I wrote these words...in that time I learned that one of the fallen was a man I had come to admire while researching the battle of the 1st Cavalry Division at the Ia Drang in Vietnam. Rick Rescorla. Rick had been the head of security for Morgan-Stanley-Dean-Witter in WTC #2 and managed to save over 2,700 people. He, and his security team were last seen heading back up to get others out. Rick's story is just one of hundreds from That Day.

Now, it is my job, as a teacher to try to tell our kids about That Day...for some of them, it is easy to grasp. For others, especially those that were very young or still unborn on That Day, it is a little harder...but we try...


Dear God, our Father in Heaven, please grant us the strength and resolve to not give in to our desires, to stand fast to our principles and continue to defend ourselves, and all those that truly want to serve and love You. For our brave Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen, and Marines, grant them the spiritual courage to face their fears and struggles, and the healing that they will need to continue on after their mission is over. Let us pray, especially for the fallen: Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine round about them. Amen.

Friday, September 08, 2006

I know its not really...

...my fault...but it feels that way...

My sins, my presumptions...

One comment that haunts me, right now...is when I said that this baby would have been unique in that no major upheavals in our lives were in sight until after the due date...

And now the baby is gone...

Upheaval

I know...or at least I don't think that God would punish our whole family for my presumptious commment, right?

But still....


God,

please be with us all....I need You so badly...

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

In Memorium

Little one,

There is so much about you that we will never know.
The colour of your eyes, your hair...
The shape of your smile,
The sound of your laugh...

Were you Oliver Quentin, with whom we would play tag and catch?
Or precious Olivia Quinn, to be spoiled and cuddled?

With all that we will never know about you...one thing that we know...
Is that you were welcomed and loved.
Your Mommy, Daddy, sister and brothers love you and always will.

Sleep well with God little one...You will always be a part of us.


O.Q.R. RIP 2 Sep 06

Monday, June 12, 2006

Cogitating

Heyas....

Ideas percolating for new rants to come...bear with me!